Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old
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A makeover for self and society.
Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old is a moving, funny, and startlingly frank collection of personal essays about what it means to look a certain way. Or rather, certain ways. Navigating Kimberly Dark's experience of being fat since childhood—as well as queer, white-privileged, a gender-conforming "girl with a pretty face," active then disabled, and inevitably aging—each piece blends storytelling and social analysis to deftly coax readers into a deeper understanding of how appearance privilege (and stigma) function in everyday life and how the architecture of this social world constrains us. At the same time, she provides a blueprint for how each of us can build a more just social world, one interaction at a time. Includes an afterword by Health at Every Size expert, Lindo Bacon. |
Praise for Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old
"Sexy and often fearless and real... beautiful and powerful work. Kimberly Dark is hilarious and heart breaking."
— Terese Mailhot, NYT Best-Selling Author of Heart Berries
— Terese Mailhot, NYT Best-Selling Author of Heart Berries
“Nothing is more brilliant and juicy to me than a woman stepping fully into herself—mind, body, and spirit, full throttle, without apology. The day we all step fully into our bodies and voices will be a revolutionary moment. Kimberly Dark has been illuminating the path for a long time. This book is a triumph. This book is a jail break from cultural inscriptions meant to keep us locked up, shut up, and conforming.”
— Lidia Yuknavitch, Author of The Chronology of Water and The Book of Joan
— Lidia Yuknavitch, Author of The Chronology of Water and The Book of Joan
"The book is a quick and engaging read that I could not put down over the course of a weekend. Dark marries her dry sense of humor with a vulnerable story-telling narrative that is so frank, I felt as if I were reading right from her personal diary. As she shares her deepest truths and the realities of growing up fat, eventually disabled, and in an ever-aging body, readers can empathize and feel empowered in whatever way their identity(ies) may intersect her stories."
— Katrina Weber, Review in Fat Studies Journal
— Katrina Weber, Review in Fat Studies Journal
"On stage as, a performer, Kimberly Dark reminds us that the body does not have to be an abstract entity divorced from the story told about it. And now in her book Fat, Pretty, and Soon to be Old she demonstrates how this interplay between narrative and feeling can be achieved with the written word too. She recounts everyday events as a white-privileged, fat, femme and we are called upon to witness, perhaps also to empathise or identify with, the myriad mundane ways in which the world and its fears shape what is deemed possible and desirable for us according to our ranking against social benchmarks of ok-ness. The conversational tone that draws us in camouflages the robust intellectual work that frames the stories. Linking the personal and political with theoretical integrity and without recourse to academic devices for legitimacy, the book serves as an exemplar of a liberatory teaching style. If you’re looking for a moving read that is also an important contribution to fat activism this is it."
— Lucy Aphramor, PhD, RD Co-Author Body Respect
— Lucy Aphramor, PhD, RD Co-Author Body Respect
"In Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old, Dark explores the reel of her own stories to question the currency of beauty and appearance. What have we actually been sold? What have we bought into about our bodies? Has the exchange ever really been worth the price? In this honest and insightful collection, Kimberly Dark offers us a new story about the body, one I believe we should all buy."
— Sonya Renee Taylor, Author of The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love
— Sonya Renee Taylor, Author of The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love
"The latest from Kimberly Dark is exactly what you want her to deliver—it’s funny, insightful, heart-breaking, all at once—and it makes you sit back and think about the relationships you have with your own body and life. Many of the essays presented in this collection are reprints from other publications, but integrated here alongside new offerings and a snappy afterward from Lindo Bacon, they take on new life and I found myself considering them in new ways. Kimberley opens the piece calling for radical cultural change, and many of her essays do stir that within you. They also bring forth laughter and tears, anger and joy. As a white super fat cis woman, I see so many of my own experiences echoed back off the page, and I feel less alone. I’m grateful to her for being willing to share herself so honestly with the us through her written and spoken word."
— Dr. Cat Pausé, Fat Studies Scholar and Fat Activist, Massey University, New Zealand
— Dr. Cat Pausé, Fat Studies Scholar and Fat Activist, Massey University, New Zealand
"It's so so good. People talk about body and bodies all the time but not about the ways our bodies move. Up and down. Backward and forward. This book redefines and strangely remakes the makeover."
— Kiese Laymon, Author of Heavy and Long Division
— Kiese Laymon, Author of Heavy and Long Division
"Kimberly Dark is a staunch believer in the power of storytelling—as a practice for developing compassion, as a tool for self discovery and self love. These intimate essays will resonate deeply for many of us, while tenderly inviting us to consider and create new narratives about bodies, lives, families, and empathy. Dark is a sorceress here, transmogrifying tired stories about people like us—fat folks, queer folks, gender minorities, folks managing disabilities, people harmed and restrained by white supremacy—into spells for solidarity, laughter, and joyful complexity. Dark isn't trying to sell us a reductive idea of self-acceptance as liberation, but she knows, and she shows, that re/writing the stories of our own bodies is critical to our communal struggle toward lasting social change."
— Erin Kate Ryan, Author of Quantum Girl Theory
— Erin Kate Ryan, Author of Quantum Girl Theory
"Kimberly Dark's storytelling feels like a joyful visit from a best friend, one who is happy to talk about painful things and—with shared awareness, laughter, and compassion—transmute them into empowerment and enjoyment. Her life stories track family influences, fat liberation, and the joys of embodiment. She's an excellent guide and companion for all of us who navigate personal appearance worries, weight-based hierarchies, and societal oppressions. Start reading now if you hope to feel more yourself and more able to change the world."
—Marilyn Wann, Author of FAT!SO?
"I can't say enough good things about Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old. Kimberly Dark is a deep thinker and a wonderful writer. It's a tall order for a book to make you kinder to yourself and others, but this one will."
—R.L. Maizes, Author of Other People's Pets and We Love Anderson Cooper
—Marilyn Wann, Author of FAT!SO?
"I can't say enough good things about Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old. Kimberly Dark is a deep thinker and a wonderful writer. It's a tall order for a book to make you kinder to yourself and others, but this one will."
—R.L. Maizes, Author of Other People's Pets and We Love Anderson Cooper
Press for Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old
The Advocate: 13 Great Books That Show There's Power in (Dis)Ability
Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old: A Makeover for Self and Society is Kimberly Dark’s treatise on the experiences of a fat, queer, gender-conforming, white-passing “pretty” girl who is still most of those things — but also aging and disabled too. Anyone who grew up with a perfectly-coiffed mother during the days when girls gazed at ads for John Roberts Powers and Barbizon modeling schools with longing or repulsion will recognize Dark’s early childhood and how much the beauty standards that taught us to conform — and how it impacted those who were, or are, unable to do so (particularly women of color and those who are fat, disabled, non-gender normative, and more). Her essays argue that childhood memory embeds itself in the cells of the stigmatized body, so much so that even those with “appearance privilege” find commercial ideals of beauty are often nearly indecipherable from our own thoughts. A slim but mighty memoir from this queer, fat activist who is also a writer, professor, and performer.
See the full list here.
See the full list here.
Bitch Media: The Hidden Gems of 2019
Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old is included in this list of truly fantastic reads--make sure to check out the full list.
Interview on "Strong Feelings" Podcast
This interview with "Strong Feelings" dives into many of the themes of the new book, Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old, including appearance privilege, marginalized/stigmatized bodies, health and human dignity.
Listen to the full episode here.
Listen to the full episode here.
Fat Studies Journal Book Review: "Redefining the 'good body'"
A new review is out of Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old in Fat Studies Journal. Reviewer Katrina T. Webber writes, "The common thread that ties Dark's relatable and witty narratives back to the reader’s experience is her refusal to hold anything back when calling out the specific societal and structural ways in which fat bodies, and other oppressed identities, are continuously stigmatized."
Read the full review here.
Read the full review here.
Autostraddle's "30 New Books of Queer and Feminist Interest to Get Excited About This Fall"
Fat, Pretty, and Soon to Be Old was chosen by Autostraddle as one of "30 New Books of Queer and Feminist Interest to Get Excited About This Fall."
Take a peek at the full list of exciting books coming out this Fall.
Take a peek at the full list of exciting books coming out this Fall.